Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Teen Talk: Belly Buttons and Future Husbands

Walking through racks of summer clothes in a department store with D3, she once again took to verbally berating me. For almost a year, she has been wanting to get her ears double pierced.

As her mother, I have taken my stance on the subject...NO.

This is my argument:
I am your mother, not your friend.
As your mother I have a job to do with you.
My job is to educate you, instill grace, morals, faith, and values in you.
I am to turn you into a independent human being who is capable of giving back to society.
My job is to give you the tools you need to become employable for whatever career path you choose.
Once you graduate with a degree, if you should still care to pierce, go ahead.
Do it before a degree and the Bank Of Mumma closes its doors. No tuition or living expense help.
So, I've done what every self-respecting mother does. I dangled a big carrot in front of her. I told her, "Bring home a 4.0 GPA and I will consider it." Thus far, she's come pretty darn close, but close doesn't punch two holes in your ears in my book.

I don't have much to complain about. She doesn't drive me too nuts about getting her ears double pierced anymore. But, this day, she decided to put a twist in her argument.

"Mumma, I've been thinking and I want to get a belly button ring."

"Excuse me?" I gasped.

"They're super cute and you can't see them when interviewing for jobs." She gave me her cutest smile in an effort to win me over by melting my heart.

"Why would you want to do that? Do you know what will happen one day when you're pregnant?"

"Oh, Mumma!"

"The piercing will stretch out and your intestines will fall out!" I lied. "Then you can only imagine how awful your stomach will look after you have the baby!"

"Mumma! First off, I'm not going to have a baby... until after I'm married, by the way. So who cares what my stomach looks like afterward!"

"You'll care, believe me... you'll care."

"And besides, the belly button piercing will help me attract a husband."

I think I have some work to do.





15 comments:

  1. I love teenage arguments. My parents wouldn't allow me to double pierce my ears while under their roof, so as soon as I moved out I went at did it - and then two years later took them out never to wear them again. I wanted a belly button ring until my roommate in college had hers get infected. Between looking gross and being in pain I decided that I could do without it. No thanks, I don't want anything pierced!

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    Replies
    1. I guess that's what I'll hope for... an infected belly button ring...on someone else. :(

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  2. Haha! This is funny. I got my belly button pierced when I was 18. My mom knew that day, but my dad didn't find out 'till years later. It's out now & you can't really tell it was ever there. Piercings are way better than tattoos at least!! Less permanent!

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    Replies
    1. A tattoo would kill me. I don't know why.. I see them and think some are cute...

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  3. I come from an immigrant traditional family. When I asked my mom for things like that she told me one thing: only sluts do things like that. (Of course not only sluts pierce their ears twice or get tattoos on their lower back BUT....you can imagine some thick accented immigrant mother ready to fall out of her chair saying such a thing.) I have to say I'm going to take that same position with my daughters. Judgmental, yes. Will I ever regret it? Who knows....Just sharing. You are wise to stand your ground. If she wants to play with her body once she is in college and it's her money (not your money) she is playing with then you can't really stop her...just talk with her about what kind of attention that stuff attracts. One of my SIL's had a cute figure and a cute face before the age of 25. Now she's got a tramp stamp on her lower back, her skin is dried out from all the sun bathing, smoking and drinking and she pulls off the homeless lesbian look better than anyone I know (she is incredibly heterosexual) and those piercings in her ears, belly and nose do her no justice. Her dad is a doctor...such a shame. She was a cute girl a few years ago. And I'm not sour grapes...Despite having had my own children I still look good in a size 4 dress with a little VS bra help carrying my tatas that have nursed babies.

    ReplyDelete
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    1. Dear Not Sour Grapes,
      OMG. I don't know who you are, but you made me choke on my spaghetti and it almost went up and out my nose!

      Delete
  4. Ahahahahaha! Clever girl you have there.

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    1. You don't know the half of it!!!! Smarty pants for sure!

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  5. I got my belly button pierced when I was a teen despite my mothers wishes, and now I wish I'd listened to her. I never thought about my belly stretching from pregnancy back then though, so at least you've forewarned her and she'll have no one to blame but herself is she does get it done. :P

    xx

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    Replies
    1. I think I'll print your comment and leave it somewhere where she's bound to see it... I'll tape it to her cell phone.

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  6. I saw a gal at the beach the other day with a "sun" tattoo around her belly button. I'm sure she thought she was hot stuff back in the day, and I bet it looked cute, but let me tell you, the sun is now setting. Her abs were nothing like I'm sure they once were, and it just wasn't pretty. Why do we have the urge to do this stuff when we're kids?! I had it, too, but I'm glad I was too chicken to do anything about it.

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  7. Ooooh dear!!!! Found this quite funny. I don't quite share your views about piercings, I think, but then I'm not a mom. I also enjoyed your humour in this. Found it hilarious that she considered a belly piercing to be a more likely idea than double-piercing her ears... I'm sure I cause my parents just as much head-shaking. Best of luck :)

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  8. On my 18th birthday I decided that my rebellion would be to get a second piercing in one of my ears. My Mom said, "You're 18, do what you want!" But she also took me to the store and paid for the piercing. AND I got very close to chickening out right before they pierced my ear. so it wasn't much of a rebellion, but that was enough for me!

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  9. In our country, a girl having her ears pierced, even double ones isn't considered such a big deal. Even nose piercing is considered ok. girls as young as 6 months and as old as 11 to 12 years are taken for piercing by their parent themselves. It's probably because it is such a big part of our culture. girls are expected to wear all this heavy gold jewellery including earrings and nose rings on their wedding days with the traditional wedding dress, the Lehnga. However getting a piercing ANY place else on the body or even a tattoo is considered taboo here.

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  10. This topic is, obviously, almost a year old and yet I'm just now finding it. I thought I would weigh in (unless it's been fully resolved, then you can just disregard what I'm saying) as someone who was in the same shoes as your D3 when I was her age, or younger.

    I begged for a second piercing when I was in middle school (I'm 30+ now). My mom, like you, wouldn't have it! She was still pissed dad took me when I was 5 to get my first set of holes. But I kept at her, constantly asking. Then, as summer got closer, I decided I wanted a bikini for swimming. She was having none of that, too! Now, being wise beyond my years, I offered a compromise to my mom: If she would let me get my ears double pierced, I would never ask for a bikini again. IT WORKED!! That summer, I got my ears double pierced, and I never asked for, or owned/wore, a bikini while I lived at home.

    So maybe offer a compromise to D3 - Double pierced ears if she never does a belly button ring as long as your are paying her way (high school, college, etc)? Once she is on her own financially, she can do to her body whatever she pleases.

    ReplyDelete

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